Tomorrow is a big day: 12:30 Ryan and I go to the surgical oncologist and then at 2pm we go to the plastic surgeon. I have good hours and then I have down time and wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy too much time to think about things. Like: What if I had not found the mole. The pic above is similar to the mole removed a couple weeks ago and is probably melanoma too. This mole could easily fit under a standard pencil eraser. The other mole had 3 little dark moles right by it like a cluster of grapes. Nothing was raised, hurt, itched, or was red. They are not alarming in the slightest.
Something just told me that they did not look right. Maybe it is because my sister has worked with plastic surgeons for almost 10 years, maybe it is because my dad is a doctor??? How many people without this added knowledge are walking around with cancerous moles on them??? What if????????? What if it is worse than what we think???
I know I shouldn't go there... but I have been there a few times since Thursday. I am not ready to be done on this earth... I want to live past 100... I feel like every mole on me right now could be cancerous.... I just want them all off. Too bad I have thousands of freckles and probably well over 100 moles. Hardly any of them are raised. The one that was melanoma was completely flush with my skin. Not the ugly mole that you are thinking of...
So, those are my thoughts... Probably most of them are illogical, I know that. Hopefully I sleep tonight...
Thanks for your prayers!
Rebekah
4 comments:
Covering you in prayer, my friend.
praying praying for you sweetie....
thanks for sharing the info and picture- it does not look bad at all- I too am always worried, "how will I know if something is not normal"???
As a freckle person too, I feel your everyday worry about this issue. Your worry has now gone way past mine now because of this.
Now you won't be able to trust any of your friendly freckles, looking at them to make sure they're not moles, and I'm sorry for that.
How dare those moles turn on you like that! Why, you haven't done anything to annoy them, and here they are now being mean. The nerve of them. humph.
Take care my friend, deep breaths, know that you are much loved and prayed for by many people.
Raising you up in prayer....may your mind rest tonight. Keep us posted!
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